The Antepenultimate Barman Poet

You know this thing? The Last Barman Poet - it's like the Aristocrats joke but for Poets - everyone writes a poem based on the performance poetry that Tom Cruise does in Cocktail ~ this is the one from the film:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XZsiY9S4WpI

I wrote a poem for it and went to submit it but looks like they don't take submissions - I didn't have a mood about it of course because I have my own publishing platform right fucking here.

so here is is:

The Antepenultimate Barman Poet

I am the antepenultimate barman poet
I had a scene in the bit before the fat yuppie got up on the stairs
Bryan also read a poem
but both ended up on the cutting room floor
which was a shame in a way because Bryan’s one was quite moving
if a little naive
and mine was the only screen time I ever had, apart from showing my penis to Cagney out of Cagney and Lacey in the opening credits for season 2
and Tom stole my snazzy / Kamikaze rhyme

the cunt

[EDIT - I'm a cock ~ they do take submissions and I submitted it thx @emmahammondpoet ]